


Be Not Afraid

by Anonymous



Category: The Old Guard (Comics), The Old Guard (Movie 2020)
Genre: Fallen Angel! Joe, Fallen Angels, Feel-good, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, M/M, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Quynh and Lykon own an orchard, References to Depression, Religious Imagery & Symbolism, Romance, Suicide mention, Town drunk!Booker, Veterans, softbois, they make jam together, veteran!Nicky
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-01
Updated: 2020-11-04
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:15:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,147
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27381796
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: The angel whispers "I was crying as I fell."And Nicolo remembers just last week, how the rain had fallen non-stop for three whole days. Flooding the roads, threatening to seep into the houses and the foundations of which they sat upon. It rained for three days despite being in the middle of summer, and the mountains had trembled. Trees shook from the force of the wind. Branches and debris littered the roads as mudslides fell and disturbed the peace of the slumbering earth.
Relationships: Joe | Yusuf Al-Kaysani/Nicky | Nicolò di Genova
Collections: Anonymous





	Be Not Afraid

"It hurt. I wasn't expecting it to hurt so much," the angel says, murmuring into the tops of his knees and hugging them close to his chest while Nicolo does his best to scrub the muck and twigs free from him. Washing away the layers of grime and viscera form the angel's fall, touching gingerly at the torn bits of skin and scrapes. Nicolo resists the urge to shudder as he pours the water down the weeping wounds of the angel's featherless back. Had their God done this? Truly? The Bible is filled with stories of Holy pain and punishment. Both heinous acts and blessings. Nicolo supposes that it is not too far of a stretch to come to this conclusion and yet... Had his God really done this to an angel of his own making?   
  
The angel whispers "I was crying as I fell."

And Nicolo remembers just last week, how the rain had fallen non-stop for three whole days. Flooding the roads, threatening to seep into the houses and the foundations of which they sat upon. It rained for three days despite being in the middle of summer, and the mountains had trembled. Trees shook from the force of the wind. Branches and debris littered the roads as mudslides fell and disturbed the peace of the slumbering earth.

Nicolo had bowed and prayed beneath the holy rain in the middle of his ruined yard, and felt the raindrops like tears on his own cheeks.

Nicolo had trembled.

"I was crying, Nicolo," the angel says again, latching onto his arm suddenly and the rag that is attached to it, bloodied and feathered, drops with a _plop_ into the water of the tub. "I was crying. I felt God _hear_ me."  
  
"And what-" Nicolo licks his lips nervously, heart beating in his chest like a bird gone mad from captivity. "What did God say?"  
  
"Nothing," the angel laughs, bitter and jaded. Eyes wide, filled with resentment and pain. Overflowing with tears. "Absolutely nothing."

Nicolo's hands shake as he bathes the angel. He bites his tongue to keep the prayers that want so badly to spill from him, at bay. But he suspects, from the rigidness of the angel before him, that he hears them all the same.

*  
  


"What is your name?" Nicolo asks tentatively, once the angel is clean, his wounds dressed, sitting nakedly and unashamed on the edge of Nicolo's bed. Waiting to be gowned in spare clothing that Nicolo suspects will pale in comparison to the Holy coverage of wings or grace that the angel used to wear before.

"You can not pronounce it," the angel says solemnly, drawing one leg up onto the bed and resting his head there, against his knee. He is watching Nicolo pitter patter about his room with dark lidded eyes. The scrutiny of which makes a shiver run down his spine.

_Be not afraid._

"Try me."

Nicolo hums a quiet hymn to soothe his mind, trying desperately to distract himself while he struggles to find pants and a t-shirt close enough in size to the angel.

The angel's eyelashes are long enough to cast shadows down his face when next he says, "You mortals speak with rigid mouths and quiet souls. You can not begin to fathom what my name is. To hear it spoken correctly would mean the end of your existence."

"The divinity of your name would kill me?" Nicolo asks, trembling as he reaches for a shirt.  
  
"Yes." The angel says, and then, with a pained sound of regret, " _No._ Actually, I am no longer divine."

"I'm..." Nicolo is not sure if he should apologize or not, but the urge to do so overwhelms him. "I am sorry."  
  
The angel studies him for a moment, frowning at Nicolo, or perhaps frowning at the situation that he has found himself in.

After a beat, the angel says "Yusuf."   
  
"Yusuf?"  
  
"It is my name. Or I guess, a version of it. Call me Yusuf."  
  
"Okay." Nicolo rolls the name around on his tongue, playing with the syllables, savoring the feel of it on his teeth. " _Yusuf,_ my name is Nicolo."  
  
"I know." The angel - _Yusuf-_ says, taking the offered clothes from Nicolo. "I've been watching you." Now, there is no time for Nicolo to dwell on that statement because then, the angel is putting his head through the sleeve.   
  
It would be funny, Nicolo supposes, if the entire situation weren't so jarring. He reaches out with shaking hands, freeing the angel of the sleeve and re-orienting the shirt, pulling it correctly over Yusuf's head until his long curls spill out from it freely.

Once the angel, _Yusuf,_ is dressed he sits there on Nicolo's bed. Swaying, as if in a daze, eyelids drooping closed only to pop back open in seconds.

"You are tired," Nicolo says.

"Tired?"  
  
"Exhausted, I'd imagine. You've had a long...journey. You should sleep."  
  
"Sleep?"  
  
"Yes," Nicolo says slowly, strangely, before realization takes hold of him. "Ah, you do not know how to?"  
  
"I suppose I do not. Will you show me?"  
  
"Just...lay here," Nicolo says, gently pushing Yusuf flat against the bed. "Lay here and close your eyes. Soon, sleep will take hold of you."  
  
Yusuf does as he is told, chest rising and falling with slow measured breaths, eyes closed and face free of burden. Nicolo is just about to walk out of the room when Yusuf opens his eyes again, worry etching its way in a crease between his brows.

"Where are you going?" 

"I'm..." Nicolo hesitates at the door, tracing the notches in the wood. "I was just going to-"  
  
"Stay, please." 

Nicolo concedes easily enough, how could he not? Swallowing thickly, he closes the door behind him with a quiet _click._

"Okay," he says, in the quiet of his bedroom. "But only until you fall asleep."

The bed dips beneath his weight. Nicolo does not dare to move, favoring the farthest side of the bed, heart beating so quickly that he imagines even Yusuf can hear it.

The angel rolls onto his side, facing him. Nicolo holds his breath and startles at the gentle touch on his shoulder and the arm draping over him, holding him close.

"Yusuf," Nicolo whispers, but the angel is fast asleep. Snoring slightly, face cradled by a halo of curls and the dim lighting of the moon. Nicolo thinks of stained glass windows, Caravaggio and Raphael. None of which can compare to the beauty of the angel beside him.

Nicolo shivers despite the warmth emanating from Yusuf. He ought to get up now. He ought to leave for the couch in his living room, but drowsiness has already begun to take hold of him and the feel of Yusuf, wrapped snuggly around him, has him feeling more safe than he has ever felt in years.

_And now I lay me down to sleep..._

**Author's Note:**

> I'm gonna be real slow to update this fic but I rlly wanted to get it out before it expires in my drafts! I don't know much about the Muslim religion but I do know that angels and fallen angels are also featured in some of the texts so I'm trying to find a respectful balance here between both Nicky's and Yusuf's religion and culture.(Obviously they are quite similar, same God, abrahamic religion, etc, but I'm'a have to do some more research so plz bear with me.)


End file.
